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It’s an enticing simulation of a hotel and there’s a definite thrill to checking in and claiming your room as a murderous base of operations. Makes ticking off the later challenges a bit of a drag.
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It also has one of the series’ strictest target routines - Alma returns home, watches TV and goes to bed - meaning lots of waiting in a bathroom cupboard as she settles in for the night. But it’s an odd tutorial for Hitman 2, given the vast size of the levels that follow. I don’t think this is a baked-in feature for every copy, so I won’t hold it against it. Well, until Tom Francis performs some sickening coin play and locks that number one spot down. With its lone target and compact size this lonely beach house hit was the stage that got me into Hitman leaderboards. Each hosts big, playful murders - giving someone a concrete bath during a construction exorcism, feeding a drug kingpin to his pet hippo, mincing up a chap with a, er, submarine - but it lacks the killer overarching narrative that glues the best levels together. It’s basically three stages stitched together: a building site, a drug farm and a luxury mansion. And I do love how the level is repurposed for the Patient Zero DLC, where you’re plonked on a radio tower, given vague target descriptions and it becomes a bonus Sniper Assassin stage.ĭespite containing the hilarious trope of ‘Agent 47 proves to be a surprise music virtuoso’ (he plays a conga drum to trigger the unveiling of a very unsteady statue) this is a location where opportunities feel too spread out and self-contained.
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On the plus side, Colorado’s scripted exit sequence was made optional in Hitman 2, redeeming it a bit. But there’s little interaction between your prey and too much of the compound is given to a few standout set pieces - a car heist simulation with a malfunctioning battering ram comes to mind. The promise of four targets in a small training camp should make for a level stuffed with malice. Although stealing cans of fizzy pop to chuck at guards is quite cathartic considering how each costs eight billion quid on British trains.
To end this celebration of sandbox ingenuity with a linear trudge feels like the last gasp of Hitman Absolution. Doesn’t do anything more interesting with the concept than Splinter Cell: Pandora Tomorrow did in 2004. It’s a corridor on wheels with none of the flexibility of other levels: you either go in loud or spend a tedious amount of time hopping out windows and shuffling along the roof. Hitman 3 ends with some bangs followed by a whimper as Agent 47 shoots his way down a train.
You know the ones.Īnd if you disagree with the list? Well good luck finding me to air your grievances. Oh, and levels that don’t over-egg the pudding with non-murder objectives.
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Mendoza ranks highly purely for letting him describe wine as only a serial killer would. But I’m mostly drawn to levels that make specific use of qualities inherent to that place (so, not just dropping another chandelier on someone), that bring together individual targets into grand acts of chaos, and that let David Bateson deliver lots of arch line readings. My criteria for quality? I enjoy the escapism of Hitman’s world travel, so some of the list doubles as dream holiday destinations.
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